Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Age & Assurance

Boy, as I grow older and gain more knowledge, I seem to loose more assurance. Not assurance in the important things of life, but more in my ability to be the thing that I have envisioned myself as. I have always thought I would one day be mature, intelligent, successful - a shinning star of sorts. The problem as I see it, is that the closer I get to that old reality of myself, the further I realize I am from it really being true. My thoughts seem so elementary to me as I compare to great thinkers, my intelligence is diminished by the lack there of and success is but a whisp of smoke. It is a very scary, humbling reality - to realize ones place in this universe. It is also a very exciting position to do business from. There is so much more out there, I am a mere student among students.

1 comment:

nattyman said...

I know what you mean. I have been feeling the same way in recent months/years. The more you know the more you realize you don't know. That is one of the major pitfalls of youth (teens in particular), they don't know how much they don't know.

I was humbled when I was reading something from C.S. Lewis and he said something regarding the work of another author but prefaced it claiming that he didn't fully understand what the author meant himself. I thought of how often I don't like to admit when I don't understand something. At that point I try to take the route that King Solomon recomends of being silent to be only thought a fool rather than opening my mouth to remove all doubt.